I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
