Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Randomize
