stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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