i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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