once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
