id be glad to
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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