Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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