Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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