just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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