so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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