the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
splinters make it hard to masturbate
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
