I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize