Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My life is pants optional.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
