More tranny stories later!
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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