On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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