Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
