Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize