You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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