i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize