I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
