Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
