I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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