Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
