All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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