I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
