He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
