You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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