after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The best revenge is premature balding
Operation Purity has been aborted
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
