Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
organizing the empties. That sober.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize