Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
