oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
