if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize