I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
