So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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