Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
