I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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