I love watching others lives come down to our level.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize