"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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