i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
