Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
