after a month anything with tits is on the radar
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Can't talk, ducks in the car
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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