I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just pee around me
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
