Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
