Barsexuality is the new black.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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