Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
