I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
