So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
