I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
