Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize