Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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